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fire flies to-and-fro

i am truly fascinated with the auto rickshaws that ply in the park circus-chandni chowk route. i don’t quite remember having ridden rickshaws on any other routes in this city where i have  suddenly been wrapped around in a dizzy hallucinogenic state of mind, before reaching my destination, be it chandni chowk, park circus or that state of reflexivity in which one tends to swim about, trying to find those vital clues to the puzzle called life.  although a brief ride, it has rarely failed to surprise me. besides, i love the route it traverses – i am very fond of elliot road, free school street, rafi ahmed kidwai road, and the numerous alleys and narrow lanes these autos invariably veer into at a blurry pace.  its a part of the city, i think , that still holds a lot of character owing to the confluence of various communities juxtaposed together in a cluster. and here, unlike most other parts of the city, life on the street is  more pronounced and cuts  open that thin line separating the private from the public. the music they play, mostly popular bollywood numbers, is played at their maximum volume, drowning all the other noises from the traffic outside. and music has become a vital feature of these autos, so much so that some passengers refuse to board them if they don’t have an audio player! as the evening progresses, the real beauty of the these autos come into play.  like fire flies they start glowing in red, green and blue hues owing to the paraphernalia of lighting fixtures installed in them, making them glow and buzz like it would in a disco from the seventies.

image copyright: Siddhartha Hajra 2010

perfectly ensconced between two conflicting emotions i have my back against this green wall.  and this dank room leaves me gasping. i want to wander about. but you drew me to this wall.  its textured roughness  nudge at my scalp. i look sideways and from the corner of my eye i catch a glimpse of your hand working away deftly, trying to bring me into life. i am only an image in your head now. soon i will manifest. wonder, if i will match up to your imagination then?

gagan chukki

gagan chukki

Special_Sunday_Fishing_Bangalore

Blah and blah

About me there is a cool breeze ruffling my hair, wearing my cranium off its furry growth.

About me a rooster’s shrill crowing rattle the walls of my room.

About me, I see people crying over a broken Borosil glass holding ice-cold beer.

About me, I feel a void.

About me there is a void.

Well, thanks for publishing about me. It is high time people get to know about me, how important a person I am – they should learn to be scared of me, eventually. They better be scared of me otherwise I will start rattling, and drop names – authors and titles alike, just to let you know how literate I am, and how unlettered you are.

 

I belong to the elite, and I have no guilt of being called an ‘elitist’ – although I openly claim my allegiance to Gandhi, this is one area of disagreement I still have with Gandhi and his egalitarian ways (If I were to meet him personally, I would have persuaded him to come off with his mask, like I have done, as he was constantly supplied by a very rich patronage to keep him in poverty!). Anyways, the Ceasework(s) programme just can’t help being inspired by Gandhi, although I have to enforce my own interpretation to his ideologies for the programme to become commercially successful and viable. I just use his name, as he’s more famous than I am (winks). At the same time one must remember that corporations like Ford have neither the time nor the discerning skills to understand Gandhi’s voluminous writings, so I make it easy for them to understand when I write our grant proposals to them. 

 

I will let you in on a little secret of mine – I masquerade as a powerful man. This is an image I have built up over the years, after many stressful sessions of schmoozing. I like people perceiving me as such; it helps me enormously in my business (I will come to that later). This power of mine is solely based on information (as opposed to knowledge, mind you!). It helps me to drop names and scare people. Unlike Nietzsche and Foucault who had once talked about power deriving from knowledge, I have my own ingenious philosophy, which is more up to date with late modernity – times that all of us now belong to, where information is the key (you do not need to know much these days to win quiz contests, just read those magazines written in journalistic haste, and bang! you’re there!).  This necessity of building a powerful façade comes from my childhood insecurities.

 

Back in my college days I had to bear with huge amount of embarrassment being an ignorant bloke as I was. But, thankfully back then I didn’t have to work in a bookstore wearing red, blue and yellow coloured clothes, selling books to equally ignorant college blokes who didn’t know anything about books, like me. Being ignorant at the same time as being earnest, I only used to play around five-star restaurants and swimming pools, and went window shopping near the Oberoi Grand Arcade. It was here that I met Mr. Ghosh, owner of the bookstore at Oberoi Grand Arcade. Through him I learned about various authors, and slowly I started picking up titles he referred me to. Not that I read all of them, or finished reading most, it was just a means to a bigger end. It got me interested in the publishing business, and helped me pick up the skills to position myself and pitch my ‘company’ as a reputable institution/ publishing house in the market. I realised how important it was to be known as a powerful man, to have that kind of an aura – this, in order to usurp all the rights of talented but desperate artists in the local market. I promised them goodies that included exposure to the glocal market and of international distribution of their published works (again, I dropped names relentlessly to make an impression, it’s all about marketing you see!)  – to this, they readily agreed, but not without some disgruntlement, for they had to give up all their rights for publication. This meant, they could not go to any other (bigger) publishing house, which would have been commercially more viable compared to what we were offering – we were paying them peanuts (chuckles). So I paved the way for making substantial profit only through overpricing. The surplus was mine, all mine. I ironed out the residual regrets they might have had in renouncing  their rights by simply throwing my weight around. I made them believe that their work was not so great to be appreciated by the masses, esoteric as they were, and that the bigger publishing houses wouldn’t even consider publishing them. Everyone soon toed the line. Before I realised, I had all the major artists in my pocket, and having been a lighting boy and fond of theatres (back when I was 16), I enjoyed the proximity this business now heralded to have my own puppet show, with all these major but desperate artists around (loud chuckle).

 

shadowred_blog

I like to collect junk, through my photographs – Lee Friedlander

little  did i know about this place. this photograph is from my last year visits to this place.

its in calcutta. which part of it is? any guesses?

also calcutta

It’s officially out.

The HRW report – TOGETHER APART – on the 11th of June, 2009, New York.

report

links: TOGETHER APART

Siddhartha

godess sitala being immersed into the river hoogly, calcutta, may 25 2009

godess sitala being immersed into the river hoogly, calcutta, may 25 2009